Relationships. Building Relationships. Being in relationship with one another. Shouldn't this be easy? Sure. It is with my best friend. My mom. My spouse and my kids...sometimes. Wait a second. What about at work? Yes. I like the people I work with. Of course I do. It's a Catholic school. We're all Christians. Okay - here comes the stereotyped Catholic guilt…
The truth is I love the people I encounter each day, but it's not always easy. I love them because of their, "yes," to choose Catholic schools despite the sacrifices we all make to answer God’s call. But just because we're Catholic, doesn't mean it's always easy to be in a relationship.
Why? Because though we are all made in God's image, we each have our own unique "temperament" thumbprint. It swirls with mostly one of the four temperaments and is shaded in a distinct combination of the other three. Art and Laraine Bennett, the authors of, The Temperament God Gave Us, encourage us to use self knowledge about our temperament to grow in virtue. It is their work, along with Carol Dweck's research on Growth Mindset that has invigorated my personal ministry.
By adopting a growth mindset, a mindset that embraces change and does not become paralyzed by failure - along with an intentional journey toward growth in virtue, we lay the foundation of Christ's call to discipleship. I argue this is not always action, nor contemplation, or even prayer.. True discipleship is first communion with one another nourished by the sacraments. Prayer is that same relationship with Christ.
Why? Because though we are all made in God's image, we each have our own unique "temperament" thumbprint. It swirls with mostly one of the four temperaments and is shaded in a distinct combination of the other three. Art and Laraine Bennett, the authors of, The Temperament God Gave Us, encourage us to use self knowledge about our temperament to grow in virtue. It is their work, along with Carol Dweck's research on Growth Mindset that has invigorated my personal ministry.
By adopting a growth mindset, a mindset that embraces change and does not become paralyzed by failure - along with an intentional journey toward growth in virtue, we lay the foundation of Christ's call to discipleship. I argue this is not always action, nor contemplation, or even prayer.. True discipleship is first communion with one another nourished by the sacraments. Prayer is that same relationship with Christ.
Of course, you're thinking... That's almost obvious. Please don't stop reading...yet!
I challenge you.
I challenge you to consider your daily encounters or avoidance of encounters. I challenge you to revise them with a new mindset - one that is intentional and empathic.
You love your children - but they're not always easy. Why? You love your spouse, but marriage is a choice and sometimes that choice is difficult. Why? You love those you journey with in your vocation, but some people just aren't on the same page as you. Why?
Because that thumbprint God gave us, sometimes it swirls in the opposite direction for someone we're working with or called to love. Some temperaments mesh in different ways and if we're not open to allowing those that are most challenging for us to encounter as an opportunity to grow in virtue, then being in communion with one another is not quite as obvious as we thought.
It means - meeting one another where we're at. And I don't mean just tapping into that person's mood that day or taking into consideration they're under stress so you can let a certain comment or moment go and forgive them. I mean really meeting them where they're at. Understanding them as a child of God through the lens of their temperament thumbprint. Being patient. Aware. Challenged to constantly grow in virtue.
I challenge you.
I challenge you to consider your daily encounters or avoidance of encounters. I challenge you to revise them with a new mindset - one that is intentional and empathic.
You love your children - but they're not always easy. Why? You love your spouse, but marriage is a choice and sometimes that choice is difficult. Why? You love those you journey with in your vocation, but some people just aren't on the same page as you. Why?
Because that thumbprint God gave us, sometimes it swirls in the opposite direction for someone we're working with or called to love. Some temperaments mesh in different ways and if we're not open to allowing those that are most challenging for us to encounter as an opportunity to grow in virtue, then being in communion with one another is not quite as obvious as we thought.
It means - meeting one another where we're at. And I don't mean just tapping into that person's mood that day or taking into consideration they're under stress so you can let a certain comment or moment go and forgive them. I mean really meeting them where they're at. Understanding them as a child of God through the lens of their temperament thumbprint. Being patient. Aware. Challenged to constantly grow in virtue.
Following a presentation giving an overview of growth mindset and growth in virtue to the Diocese of Lansing administrators, Tim Carpenter, the Director of Catechesis, said this to me afterward…"This is what Christ DID. He met us where we were at."
Now that should have been obvious to me as it is the life and breath of my message - but until that moment I hadn't comprehended my own words yet at that very primordial level. It for me was a true epiphany. Yes. Christ DID. He met me, little struggling me, where I am at. He is God. Made flesh. Made to bruise - both physically and emotionally. Made to breathe and to hunger - physically and spiritually. Made to laugh. Made to cry. And made to die. Christ met us where we are at, even though He is so far above our small, diminutive scope of life and death.
Now that should have been obvious to me as it is the life and breath of my message - but until that moment I hadn't comprehended my own words yet at that very primordial level. It for me was a true epiphany. Yes. Christ DID. He met me, little struggling me, where I am at. He is God. Made flesh. Made to bruise - both physically and emotionally. Made to breathe and to hunger - physically and spiritually. Made to laugh. Made to cry. And made to die. Christ met us where we are at, even though He is so far above our small, diminutive scope of life and death.
