Sunday, June 11, 2017

Quieting Down

Just the other day a colleague entered to my office and I wanted to reference something on my computer. On it I had 8 “tabs” open of tasks that I needed to complete and as many open documents. I wearily looked up at her and recalled a joke someone had once said about too many tabs being open at once in their head.

In my world, they are usually open because while in the process of trying to complete one I realize I have a loose end that I must resolve before I finish the task. Or, they are left there because someone needed my immediate attention and I had to sidetrack. 

Have you ever had that experience where you arrive at a destination only to wonder how because you seemed to be on some sort of autopilot the whole drive? 

Have you ever wondered when praying what thoughts are yours and what thoughts are the influence of the Spirit?

I mentioned Richard Hauser’s book, In His Spirit, in my last post and I will probably be referencing it more in the coming weeks since it has had great influence on me becoming more in tune with Spirit and maturing in my prayer life. 

Hauser lays out five steps to prayer make the proper conditions for shutting down all those tabs, taking our mind out the distractive state of autopilot, or releasing ourselves from anxieties that tend to rule our state of mind (86).

  1. Quieting Down
  2. Making acts of the presence of God
  3. Focusing on the Word of God
  4. Listening and responding to the Word
  5. Concluding with a short prayer

I have found that depending on one’s temperament we face certain obstacles in spending time truly attentive to our Lord. I guess the same is true about our habits being attentive to those we spend time with. We live in such a distractible culture! So today let’s examine the first step -  quieting down.

One might assume that this is easier for the often introverted melancholic or phlegmatic, but that is not true. We need to be aware of the vices of our temperaments and our habits so we can put effort in the right places for making the conditions most pure for the Spirit to be present.

Let’s start with the sanguine…It is hard for the sanguine to quiet down in their human and personal relationships, so imagine how much harder it is when trying to get centered on God. I often find myself starting out with good intentions, “Dear God, I want to tell you thank you for the visit from Michelle today just when I needed it…” but before I know it I am thinking about something my train of thought took me too that I can’t get my mind off. Even worse, I find myself up and about doing some sort of busy task. 

Don’t worry! If  you are self aware of these habits during prayer, you can redirect even these moments to God by asking him to be present in the problem that is distracting you. 

Sanguine Solution: Invest time in creating an atmosphere conducive to quiet…Go where you won’t be interrupted by either another person or an object, note, etc. that will sidetrack you. 

The melancholic who is naturally introverted may not be so loquacious and distractible when sitting down with God, but may suffer from anxieties that are dominating his or her thoughts. He or she might have a hard time preparing to “rest in the Lord” because they can’t quite get past a worry or concern that has been troubling them often allowing their mind to play out various scenarios, possible solutions, and unexpected consequences. 

Melancholic Musts: When feeling anxious about your own problems try just repeating a favorite scripture passage or traditional prayer until you are able to enter into a sense of peace and quiet. 

The phlegmatic and choleric might face an entirely different obstacle…putting off prayer altogether. Yet, once they sit down they can get easily themselves in tune with their Lord with the strategies mentioned above.

The choleric who is always “on the go” faces a similar problem as the phlegmatic, but for different reasons. They are so driven and goal oriented - often times our human goals will supersede the need to pray…and a day easily passes without having taken an appropriate amount of time to dedicate to the Lord.  Also, a choleric might struggle with rushing through prayer and never getting past superficial levels of thought to truly listen and respond to the Spirit.

Suggestions: Include prayer in your daily agenda. Put prayer reminders in your day in a physical way. If you must put a time in your phone with an alert, write it on a sticky note that you know you will see (bathroom mirror), include it on your calendar. 


This week as the busyness of summer creeps in, let us take that time to quiet down and be intentional about making space in our minds and hearts to hear God’s voice and heed His will. 

Sunday, June 4, 2017

In the Moment

Did you miss your Fixed on God, Growing in Virtue email last week? I missed writing it! I was praying for all of you as I took a moment to live in the moment with my family. 

Last weekend marked the 19th anniversary of my father’s passing. Do you ever have that feeling that you wish you knew then what you know now? 

How different my life would have been if I had been taught to be an intentional disciple of Christ through virtue and that I could grow in virtue through every interaction with those I love.

My relationship with my father taught me great virtue, but it wasn’t  intentional. It was because I adored him and wanted to mirror his generosity, his affability, his perseverance, and the joy he brought so many people.  He was loved by all and had a charisma that moved people. He had many vices, but because he was my personal hero - I tended not to notice them. I only sought his approval. 

Oh, how this should mirror our personal relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

As I recall my father now and each sacred memory, the vices are so faint that one might argue I have altered the reality of what life was really like. Maybe being an empathic disciple of Christ means doing just that in the moment with those we encounter today…Purposefully looking past the unbearable, human moments of one another to see the whole picture of what makes a person incredibly special and unique.

Today is Pentecost Sunday. We celebrate the gifts of the Spirit that we receive through our virtues; joy, peace, love, patience, gentleness, kindness, and self control. 

I argue that since my father’s passing, the warmth and love I feel when I think of him are not a naive attempt to idealize him. Rather, the Spirit Himself is present and helps me to see with the Love of Christ what is true, good, and beautiful in that relationship. I see what remains after everything else melts away. 

Perhaps we can ask the Spirit to guide us in these same efforts as we restore, create, and nurture the relationships we have in the present moment. So often we allow our fallen humanity to define these relationships. What would happen if we asked God to let us see one another always through the Spirit? 

More importantly what are we doing to first restore, create and nurture the most important relationship we have - that with our Lord? I enjoyed this thought by Richard J. Hauser in the book, In His Spirit, “As in human relationships, words become less necessary the more we get to know a person; good friends can enjoy one another’s company while saying very little.” I of course felt that way about time spent with my father and now feel that way about time spent with my own children. 

In the coming weeks, I’d like to explore how our temperaments assist or resist cooperating with the Spirit and deepening our relationship with the Lord so that words become less necessary…so that we can move beyond our natural tendencies in prayer or overcome the obstacles that keep us from prayer.

For now, take a moment to reflect on someone you love that you no longer get to see that often or will never see again. What is true, good, and beautiful in that relationship? Can you put it into words? Do you need words? What is a moment you treasure that you no longer take for granted? 

 Now take a moment to think of someone who is near or you could make near to you with just a little effort. Maybe it is time to do so and just be in the moment…let the Spirit lead you.


Come, Holy Spirit!